Walnut Room this way

Walnut Room this way

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Yes, I know I said I was back...and then there was that web of life thing.

And, I had every intention of doing so.  But, as my mom used to say, "the road to hell is paved with good intentions."  I have been working on my posts in my spare time, editing the pictures from the road trip, doing the research...but then life got in the way.

First up, was the web of life.  I like the philosophy of Mulberry Shoots, and last week, the post was the web of life.  It resonated with me...and then, Saturday morning, I opened the blinds to notice the raindrops shimmering on...a giant web of life...yes, a perfectly symmetrical spider web...with a giant spider in the midst of it.  Short story, I really don't like spiders.  I can admire the art of the web, the beauty of it, but the creature in the middle?  It just gives me the heebie jeebies.  I recognize and value their role in the ecosystem, and outside, can leave them be.

But, as the Bard said, "here's the rub."  It was right outside my window...and just over the pet door that Libby goes in and out of 15 times a day.  Now, I carefully inspected and noted that the web, while spanning roof to ground, also had a perfect little flat-top vee shape that did not cover the entrance to Libby's pet door.  You see, my first thought was as she would go out, or come in, she would disturb Ms. Queenie, and invoke said female's wrath...that, or she would decide to trot her eight little legs in through the pet door.  That would be more than the heebie jeebies.

So, as the rain poured on Saturday and nothing seemed amiss, I kept thinking about the ecosystem, and the web of life, and making every effort to convince myself why the spider and the web outside my window was no threat to me.  Sunday, it was still there, and I found myself at the window repeatedly, just checking.  Nope, no change in position.  Yep, still the same spider in the center of the web.  I thought of options: can I just gently catch it on the rake and move it to the tree?  Yes, that will destroy the web, but hey, she can build another one--apparently overnight.  Did I mention the fear that she would for whatever reason, trot her eight legs through Libby's door and I would turn around to see her inside the window?  I kept thinking about the post on the web of life...and my commitment to honoring the ecosystem, and doing no harm.  Damn, I hate it when you have to live up to your commitments and actually do that which you say you believe.

And then, Monday morning I opened the blinds...and the spider and the web were both gone.  Does a spider unspin the web when it needs to relocate?  Did some bat or bird intervene?  This is even creepier, because now I don't know where she is, or why.  I looked high and low inside and out.  Nope, no sign.

Was it a sign that when I moved to acceptance, and released the need to intervene, that the universe took care of the problem for me?  I know many times in my life once I have surrendered, I have received that which I desired.  Or, am I just seeking a sign because it makes sense to me and I need to understand it that way?

Sometimes, I understand why Native Americans call it the "sickness of the long thinking."

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